If you spend any time looking at fashion magazines or blogs, I’m sure you’ve noticed the attraction to all things French, especially French women who possess that certain je ne sais quoi. 

I recently saw a list of must-have items I needed to look tres chic and discovered my closet was missing nearly all of them. Quel dommage! (I took French in high school and have now impressed you with nearly all I remember.)

While I wouldn’t mind purchasing the required Burberry khaki trench coat ($1,795) and quilted 2.55 Chanel shoulder bag ($3,499), what I’m really looking for is something the French call bien dans sa peau. Literally translated, it means to feel good in one’s skin, but more accurately, to be completely at ease with oneself.

Oh, the angst that could have been avoided had I bought some of that bien dans sa peau in my twenties! Alas, something so intangible can’t be wrapped up in a pretty box and purchased. Like so many lovely things, it’s something money can’t buy.

I’m fairly certain there are many women who bought said trench coat and shoulder bag who were disappointed it did not come with the elusive bien dans sa peau. I do believe that some attention to our wardrobe can bring us confidence and ease, but there’s more to peace of mind than a few perfect pieces of clothing.

I picture Holly Golightly standing outside Tiffany’s window, breakfast in hand, wistfully imagining exactly what goodies would come in a perfectly wrapped blue box of bien dans sa peau. Here’s what I think she’d find~

• Self-Worth~ We deserve to be respected and treated well by others. (It follows that we honor other people’s worth, thereby doing our little part to foster world peace.)  For example: While it will be hard to break-up with the boyfriend who often loses his temper, you know there is someone out there who wants to treat you like a princess.

• Self-Care~ We respect and treat ourselves well. Our bodies, minds, and souls deserve the best.  For example: While you could save a little cash by trimming your own bangs, you go to the salon and save money by skipping that violent movie and greasy popcorn.

• Self-Confidence~ We remain confident in our carefully-crafted choices and opinions. For example: While admiring that your friend can pull off the latest drop-crotch pants, you happily stay true to your classic pencil skirt.  

• Self-Improvement~ We strive to be our best selves. We approach our teeeennsy flaws with gentleness, knowing that every day is a new chance to do better. For example: While you found yourself joining in catty office gossip today, tomorrow you’ll try to steer the conversation to something more gracious. 

If we could hang these four things in our closets, we’d be well on our way to feeling like the creme de la creme we are, whether wearing our little black dress or not.

Think On These Things~ Alicia

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