A Good Friday

It is Good Friday, and I sit with my father at the Simon Cancer Center in Indianapolis, numbly listening to a team of well-meaning research doctors. My dad has bravely carried the burden of advanced prostate cancer for over a year now, each day providing a shining example of amazing strength and spirit.

He soldiered through months of intense chemotherapy and miraculously went from being bed-ridden to feeling almost like his old self again. Earlier this month, he flew to Arizona and played golf. But a week ago, the cancer snuck back during the night and attacked quickly. Today he breathes heavily, winces occasionally, and struggles to rise out of the wheelchair. Damn cancer.

On Easter, we are reminded that we have a loving heavenly father. I am fortunate to have a loving earthly father as well. He’s not perfect, like Jesus, but, oh, how he has loved. My parents will celebrate 55 years of marriage on April 1. As a husband, he has loved. My sisters and I know that as a father, he has loved. As a dentist, Sunday school teacher, neighbor, basketball coach, choir director, community leader, friend, and grandfather, he has loved.  Well done, good and faithful servant.

I get my dad home from the hospital and drive to my church, blinded by the tears I’ve been holding inside. There is a Good Friday Cross Walk today. I can’t get there fast enough. I need to talk to Jesus about my problems. God, I’m selfish. I stumble through the stations of the cross, unable to focus on Jesus, who was cruelly betrayed, unjustly convicted, and brutally crucified. At each station, I cry harder, “Jesus, please heal my dad. Take away the cancer. Let him live.” And then I hear it.

He will live. Forever. Without pain and suffering. In a place more beautiful and peaceful than you can ever imagine.

And I can breathe again. Thank you, Jesus.

~Think On These Things~

Alicia

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14 comments

  1. Lynda L Fry · · Reply

    My lovely daughter has written a brave and gracious letter for all of our family! Thank you, my dear.

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    1. Harry & Jana · · Reply

      Beautifully written, Alicia…..we will keep Allen, his doctors, family and friends in our prayers. Love and hugs to all

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      1. Thanks to you and Harry for your prayers and love.

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    2. Harry & Jana · · Reply

      Beautifully written, Alicia…..Allen will continue to be in our thoughts and prayers…..love and hugs to all

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    3. Thank you, Mom! I pray this post gives you hope, too. You and dad have both been shining examples in my life. Love you.

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  2. and for us….my our God bless you all.

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    1. Judy, thank you for your lifelong love and support!

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  3. Cindy Clark · · Reply

    That was beautiful Alicia. I worked in the same office as your dad and I respected and love your dad. I will be praying for healing and comfort for you all. God bless you all!

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    1. Hi Cindy…thanks so much for your kind words. Dad greatly appreciates it, as do I.

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  4. Jerie Schmidt · · Reply

    Absolutely beautiful Alicia. Your father is a wonderful man and loved by many. May God bless all of you this Easter Eve. Many thoughts and prayers to all the family.

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  5. That was beautifully written. You expressed frustrations, fears, faith, hope and love from the deepest crevices of your heart. Thanks for sharing! Jon

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  6. Oh my. I sit here in tears from a burdened heart for you and from the joy that I feel as you’ve reminded me of the one who gives us life. Thank you for sharing your heart. Your words have touched me…and what a great man!

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  7. Absolutely beautiful. My dad was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer, I feel your pain.

    Much love
    xoxo ash

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  8. Teresa Bell · · Reply

    What a beautiful testimony of faith and love. Will be praying for strength for all of you and peace and comfort for Allen- long time friends & patients Kenny & Teresa Bell

    Liked by 1 person

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